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Where are the single mothers ?

Answered 10 months ago

Just saying hi. Tell me about your situation, how you are coping, and if you date.

I feel so isolated and alone. I am the only single parent in my friendship groups, and my ex husband is a nightmare who believes he’s father of the year from his maybe 5 hours a week he visits our child. They have a terrible relationship, I used to try and help them but now I stay out of it and the psychologist handles the ex. He verbally will attack me, last week it was about me wearing a mask at work, this happens every Sunday he visits to see our child, so now my parents come over to be a buffer so he’ll behave. I am sad about this. I’ve tried everything. It all triggers him. I thought divorce would protect me from this.

I have tried dating, but I only had one night a week to date at that stage. Found the online apps to be an enormous waste of time.
I now have legal full custody, so focused on my health, career and child. Those are going great. But now I’m deeply lonely. It’s been 4 years and I haven’t even had a boyfriend since my divorce.

Please tell me that I’m not the only one out there living the full time mum life, as well as working and doing it all solo. I’m starting to wake with a racing heart because each day is so so busy. Even in lockdown. I never stop.

I guess this is me feeling pretty miserable, and wanting to know this shall pass. Always does right?😅😉
I’m meditating on gratitude which helps. That I am mostly free from my abusive marriage. That my child’s going so well. Work is steady in a time when many are suffering. We have food on the table and a safe home to live in.
Suppose it being Sunday just has me nervous about what will happen !


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ANSWER
10 months ago
Not single but I’m a single parent lol

ANSWER
10 months ago
Im not single but lots of my friends are. You sound like a very strong brave Mum who is putting her child first. Big hug, hang in there xx

ANSWER
10 months ago
I was a single mum for 15 years. I just didn’t want to date I had my child and me and that was enough for me.
I begun dating when she was about 18, met fell in love and had a baby and was widowed in pregnancy. My boy is 7 now and I haven’t dated.
I just don’t feel like dispersing my energy.
My kid gets my whole energy and I get what’s left for me.
IMO they both had enough going on then having a mum who was also off trying to have company.
I can’t answer to the lonely cos iv never felt lonely by myself.
Companions have never been needed for me. I’m what people would say an extra very, I’m talkative , friendly, I work with kids, but iv also just always been happy alone too.

Also, (I know this isn’t everyone so hope no one crucify me for this) BUT if I were to date I felt like it never could have gone anywhere, I would have never moved them in while my children were living and a younger age because I feel like that’s not my risk to take exposing them to a bad person.

But in terms of the loneliness , why aren’t you happy alone? Perhaps if you can find the answer to that it would help with the loneliness.
Maybe you just need some solid friendships?

Or not. Lol just thoughts :)

ANSWER
10 months ago
Single mum its tough lonely and quite depressing

ANSWER
10 months ago
Where u from?

ANSWER
10 months ago
Honestly, don't bother. I got into a relationship and now I wish I hadn't. Find a new friend who'sJust like you and forget the boyfriend

ANSWER
10 months ago
I’m a single mum. My first ex is currently in jail, which is both great because he was abusive so I’m not constantly worried but bad because it would be good if he could get his shit together and be the father he was when we were together. My youngest’s father I was with 6 years after I broke up with my ex. It took me that long to fix myself enough not to worry about bringing my shit into a new relationship and get the time to actually start dating again. He bailed when I fell pregnant, now it’s just my kids and me and dating is so far from something I want. It took me about 4-5 years the first time not to feel lonely and miss having someone there all the time. Now I’ve become quite selfish and would only settle down for someone who would compliment my life, not complicate it. Dating is the last thing I want now and I have a friend who does the physical needs and another friend who does my emotional needs, family to help out whenever and friends to have coffee dates with, which is one of the things I actually missed. Not much help with the dating side here but if you want to be comfortable just being single then there are so many ways you can do it.

ANSWER
10 months ago
I’m laughing at myself for posting anonymously on the internet 😂