Who should initiate sex and how to go about that?
Answered 10 months ago
My wife is used to the men initiating sex all the time, leaves me feeling like she doesnt desire me. I dont expect her to do it all the time but once in a while would be nice. Ive expressed this to her but we keep falling back into just not having sex because if i dont come to her she wont. Then she gets very insecure that we are not having sex. And starts asking me if i am cheating or what not. Which im not i never would. I love my wife. I desire her very much, i just wish i felt desired by her as well. She doesnt show it.
Have an answer?
We have a lot to worry about work, kids, family, friends, partners, housework, cooking, homeschooling, worrying about finances etc and sometimes something so trivial as initiating or sex at all just comes in the background.
Is it really that important that she initiates sex?
If you feel un wanted you need to work on yourself, its not up to your wife to boost your ego.
Furthermore with everything going on in the world sex is the last thing that people shoukd be worried about. You know what to do if she doesnt want sex do it yourself.
Maybe she’s just not as sexual but when you initiate and things get going she gets into it. When she question why your not having sex remind her that if she wants it, having a crack at it is better than having a conversation 😉
I completely understand how it’s wrapped up in your feeling undesired. I want sex much more than my fella and it hurts being knocked back. Certainly puts a dent in the self esteem. Good luck!