Christmas is all about spending time with loved ones.
However, if you and your partner have recently split up or have been separated for a while, then this time of the year is probably dreaded more than celebrated. Christmas should be a happy time filled with exchanging gifts, delicious food and drink and most importantly, watching your little ones enjoy the spirit of the festive season.
When you are faced with separation it can be a stressful and even sad time of the year for both you and the kids.
So here are a few tips to make this day a little easier on all parties involved:
Be Aware of How the Kids Feel
It is completely possible to make Christmas Eve and Christmas Day a fun time for your kids but you can expect that they may feel a little anxious and sad about the upcoming day, especially when they have to leave one parent behind to go to the other parent’s house.
So make sure you talk to your kids about the game plan during Christmas and if they are going to be spending some or all of the day with your ex-partner, then let them know that this is okay. Don’t make them feel guilty or sad knowing that you are upset about it. And don’t blame your partner in front of them, no matter how resentful and upset you feel.
Communicate with Your Ex-Partner
Make sure you have a plan in place for around Christmas time and try to cater to both of your desires. Obviously you will both want the kids for the entire day so you need to compromise. Think about things like traffic and driving distance and talk about meals and gifts beforehand so that you are not overfeeding and over spoiling them.
For example, if your partner plans on feeding them a massive dinner with his parents and family, then why not opt for a light lunch with the kids. You can stray away from the normal traditions and make your own. Christmas BBQ lunch sounds quite scrumptious and could be just the thing to break away from the traditional family Christmas that didn’t work so well when you were together. When you are making arrangements for Christmas do so when the kids are not around so that if you do get into an argument, they will not overhear and get upset.
Make Use of Boxing Day
Keep in mind that Boxing Day is also a public holiday so if you have them on Christmas day, then offer to give him the kids for Boxing Day or vice versa.
If you and your partner live several hours away from one another, then driving all day on Christmas Day just to make it for dinner at your ex-partner’s house is not the best way to spend Christmas for the kids. Keep their day in mind when making any plans and use the days around Christmas as well.
Keep Busy With Loved Ones
If you don’t have the kids for Christmas or if you only have them for part of the day, then make other plans with family and friends.
This will keep you distracted and less upset that you are not spending the entire day with your children. It’s all about compromise when you and your partner have separated and it’s all for the sake of the children.
Keep these things in mind and the day will run much smoother.