Ways To Be A More Present Parent

In our day and age, there are a million things screaming for our attention at any one time. With the plethora of technology we have at our finger tips being a present parent can, at times, require some work.

Changing technology has radically reshaped the way we work, live and socialise and not necessarily for the better. Emails, smart phones and social networks were supposed to set us free, liberating us to live and work flexibly. Instead, they’ve trapped us in a never ending cycle of multi-tasking.

Here are 7 great tips for being present  with our children and giving them our focus.

Have periods with no technology

Gadgets are great. They allow us to stay connected whilst at home with the kids, work from home or access the internet anywhere, anytime. But they can also keep us from being totally present with our kids. One of the first ways to be a present parent is to turn off your devices for periods throughout the day.

Get rid of other distractions

Having an over-scheduled life is distracting. Too many chores, play dates, catch ups with friends or other commitments are all distractions from the day. You can’t stop life to pay attention to your child every moment of the day, but there are times of the day where distractions need to be minimalised and you give them your full attention. Kids love nothing more than having your full attention and you will enjoy the time spent together bonding.

Schedule or set aside time to chill

If you are a super duper over achieving mama, or operate best on routine, setting aside present parent time could work for you. Simply set aside some time to chill out with your kids without other distractions. It is okay to plan quality time with your kids, the point is to make it happen.

Plan activities

With my kids, we have all different kinds of time. We sometimes hang around the house doing our own thing, we sometimes have adventures in the garden or kitchen. Other times, we go to the beach or park and make sand castles or swing together. We usually make a plan for an adventure every day together. This keeps us all engaged and present in the moment and what we are doing together.

Ask questions

It is easy to tune out as a parent when the kids are chatting away. Focus on your kids as completely as you can when they are trying to have a chat and demonstrate your involvement by making frequent comments and asking questions. On occasions when you can’t listen, explain why so that they know it’s nothing personal.

It’s important to remember that a child who is regularly put off may begin to feel that what they have to say isn’t worth much and may start to keep to themselves more.

Practice good listening, and in turn you’re teaching it

Active listening will keep you present. Active listening means that we make an effort to keep our attention centred on the person who is speaking to us instead of letting our minds drift. This takes practice but leads by example.

Enjoy the moment

Sometimes, you just need to make an active decision to enjoy the moment. Savour the special times with your kids. I may have sat through 10,000 tea parties, but the conversation is different, and hilarious, every time. In the future, you don’t want to look back and regret how you missed out on great times just by not being a present parent.

Being a present parent is not always easy. What distracts your attention? How do you pull yourself into line?