9 Things Mums Talk About That Work Effectively As Contraception

By the time you reach the point in your life where total strangers feel like it’s okay to remind you that your biological clock is ticking, you’ve probably already got a few friends who are mums.

If they’re reading this, thank you because listening to your parenting conversations is all the contraception I need.

When I sit down to a cup of coffee with some of my ‘mummy mates’ or chat with the ladies I work with who are in the throes of ‘joyful parenting’ I’m guaranteed to get an earful. I like to do this on a regular basis just to remind myself why I’m not ready to have children. It really is the best contraception on the market, and the cheapest as well.

I’ve decided to compile the best of these things into one place, just in case I need my anti-child fix, and so you can have yours too.

9. Gosh that must have been really hard for you to deal with”¦ Stop peeing on your brother! No really, I’m listening.

When you’re friends with mums, I can guarantee that you’re going to have some of your catch-ups over the phone. It’s just easier to do that than to wrangle all of the children into a vehicle and out into public. So, while on the phone make sure you keep your ears open for all the gems that you’ll hear to put a cork in your brooding nature. You can get annoyed about the fact that your friend isn’t listening, or you can relish your own ability to have uninterrupted phone calls.